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“See Something, Squeal Something” in the Age of Sanctimonious Snitches
A Field Guide for identifying obedience within a society or human husbandry.
Introduction
In the year of our programmed grid, a new breed of informant has risen—not out of necessity, but out of neurosis.
Behold the Brownie Point Inquisitors:
Armed with nasal voices, an Amazon Prime addiction, and a deep misunderstanding of open-source technology, they roam HOA meetings, coffee shops, school corridors, and Facebook forums in search of one thing:
A chance to be useful without ever doing anything useful.
These aren’t whistleblowers. These are whimper-blowers.
Profile of the Modern Inquisitor:
- Name: Probably Ashley or Kayleigh
- Tone: Slightly anxious, slightly smug, very nasal
- Motto: “I just thought someone should know…”
- Credentials: PTA treasurer, essential oil ambassador, once watched a documentary on Netflix about “data”
Scenario 1:
“She Was Talking About Frequencies…”
“So I was at Whole Foods, and this woman—she looked, I don’t know, like she reads… a lot?—started saying something about the human body being networked or something? I got really nervous. Like, what if she’s an enemy combatant? I just don’t think it’s safe to talk about, like, bandwidth in the vitamin aisle.”
— Kayleigh M., 38, reported via iPhone while sipping a matcha latte
(Call received by DHS, immediately marked as “routine Karen event”)
Scenario 2:
“She Knew What a WBAN Was”
“My yoga instructor doesn’t even know what a WBAN is, and she has a PhD in chakras. So how did this woman know? I don’t know… It just felt… dangerous. She said DARPA out loud. I grabbed my purse and texted Homeland. Felt like the right thing to do.”
— Ashley B., 42, full-time wine mom, part-time prophet of panic
(Brownie Points Awarded: +2 for tech terms, -1 for not recording)
Scenario 3:
“She Said She Contacted the Sheriff Herself”
“Like, who does that? What kind of person goes directly to the sheriff? That’s what weirdos do. I think she’s trying to trick law enforcement by being transparent. Classic reverse psychology. I think she might be… tactical?”
— Call logged under “Willingly Visible Citizen Suspected of Witchcraft”
Honorable Mentions:
- Whispers “She has printouts” like it’s a slur.
- Called someone “dangerous” for explaining insulin pump vulnerabilities.
- Hysterically claimed “She cited sources!” as if citations = subversionThe Real Danger:
These people are not defenders of peace. They are the hall monitors of decline, the gatekeepers of mediocrity, and the spiritual tattletales of our time. They don’t understand scientific words. They don’t want to. They just want to squeal—because squealing feels like power in a system that gives them none.
Brownie Points Conversion Chart:
Action Brownie Points
Reporting someone for using the word “biotech”
+1
Citing DARPA, IEEE, or WBAN
+2
Including hyperlinks in conversation
+3
Speaking in full sentences with evidence
+5
Wearing natural fabrics and carrying a printed article
Instant surveillance alert
Final Decree:
Let it be known throughout the land:
We, the People, do hereby laugh—with full volume and clarity—at every squealing soul who mistakes discernment for deviance and truth for terrorism.
Open-Source ≠ Espionage
The information we are sharing:
- Biotech patents
- WBAN standards
- Neurointerface white papers
- Government documents
- DHS guidelines
- IEEE and NIH publications
…is all public.
If people are turning us or others in for talking about this, it’s because they don’t want it to be real. And turning others in for discussing such is their emotional coping mechanism. It’s a ritual. A cry for approval. A submission to false authority.
They’d post another picture on social media of themselves speed dialing social services hotlines and DHS, if Tik Tok tells them to.
What They’re Really Doing
They’re not “protecting the public.”
They’re:
- Seeking recognition from a synthetic authority structure.
- Hoping to be seen as “a good citizen” in a system that rewards obedient surveillance over moral intelligence.
- Reacting to their own discomfort when someone talks about things they don’t understand.
This isn’t about national security—it’s about social scoring by proxy. Brownie points in the Beast technological synthetic system.
It’s Weaponized Ignorance
And it often sounds like this:
“She’s talking about implants and surveillance! That’s suspicious!”
But if you ask them what a TRPV1 channel is? Or what ISO/IEEE 11073 means?They stare blankly. They’re not defending truth. They’re defending their worldview—and they’ll sacrifice anyone who challenges it just to avoid having to think.
You cannot arrest thought. You cannot contain what YAH has set free. And you certainly can’t stop us with your wide eyes blinking, nasally voice and middle school tattletale tactics.
Signed:
The Ultimate Hall Monitors of Mendacity
Sovereign by Grace
Brownie Points: Negative Infinity
Naysayer Corner:
There aren’t really any papers written about this because grant funding doesn’t usually go toward predictive, boring, subjects. Yet, if you find yourself as being one of those who enjoy gossiping or snitching on people you can’t understand, take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself, “Have I gotten my brownie points today?”
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