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Sometimes actions speak louder than words
When I was in need, she was there. She saw things in an unconventional way. But she saw things with her heart – which she wasn’t afraid to wear on her sleeve.
“Gerry, what are we going to do about this?!” “This is horrible!” “Somebody needs to hold these people to account!”
She first came to my home with biker boots and torn jeans. We kept a safe distance from each other. I think I came with a little baggage too. Those in the “out there” community know of being cautious. If you’d have some prior knowledge of my past involvements, then you’d rightly be a little cautious, too.
You Will Know Them By Their Deeds
In speaking with her that first time, we shared stories of who we knew and what we thought of them. It doesn’t serve me to be dishonest or hide anything. It’s just that, some things get a reaction that tells you if someone is ready to hear certain information.
We plodded along in our hours long get-to-know each other. But we were both ready for each other and came from a similar group. The internet is a strange place for meeting like-minded people, but we were in a committee of sorts and she wanted to further her cause. She had very high stakes in some interests. I had a sense of understanding. The open-mindedness to listen and offer understanding is a thing about me. For this situation, confession is good for the soul, and things that others don’t readily believe, I’m all ears for – having heard things pretty out there.
She had similar things to share – about bad people, underground strongholds, insane wealth, and past experiences working around the mob. After sharing a few things and finding common ground, we were kinda bonded. The male and female dynamic is a real thing and you get drawn to someone who “gets” you. I think I’m pretty grounded and normal – but if you take a certain view of me, I’m pretty out there. She was pretty out there too, but wanted to have grounding.
Time The Revelator
We set out on a few missions together and we produced quite a few pieces and works that moved the needle and saved a lot of lives. We exposed a few tyrants. We appeared as lights in the shadows. When one got down, we held the other one up. When she needed a hand, I helped as I could. When I needed one, she helped as she could. She never really knew that setting me up with a gig one time would actually open the door to another one that kept my stability going.
She was a mother. Though I didn’t know her kids, I knew her heart. I knew her love for them. She knew things about me too. I’d think about her often and for a time we talked several times a week. Then we kinda drifted or got busy, or pivoted from several causes that we were in together.
She never failed her word to me. She was the best version of herself with me. And her crackly voice, filled with a slight tremor and New York street song at times would come up, paired with her fighting spirit. And I knew I was in the presence of a special warrior Queen. She knew it too.
But she also knew that this world was too damaged. She knew that the part she saw had gone dark for too long. Her heart bled for that. Her mind weighed so many things too heavily. And as she’d get attacked, she lost the strength to fight back.
She talked to God.
She had regular conversations with Source. She’d find out things about herself all the time. She had much deeper conversations than I was aware of and I missed out on her stories of what was going on towards the end as life got busy for us both. I loved hearing those things when we were in the thick of things. It always corroborated things for me. I’m lucky to have some ability in this as well, and I know a few others who do the same. They’re on a different wavelength.
I didn’t get to see her fall. But I sure was there for her fights. You may never have a friend who can scrap like her in the higher realms. And you know you’re in the presence of a helluva angel when you see it firsthand. Or they come to you in dreams.
We lost that connection. But I didn’t ever lose her in my circle of awareness – just in the circle of this stressed out reality. I really looked forward to building something together with her on the other side of this Shift. Maybe we still will?
I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you girl. I’m sorry that you didn’t reach out. I’m sure you thought of it. But I know that you were too proud. I can hear you say how scared you were. I can hear you say my name so clearly. And I can also imagine you being mad at God again for this as a result. But I also suspect that you worked it out and are doing something right now that you agreed on. At least I hope so.
Come by a dream some night soon and let me know, ok?
I love you honey, and I will miss you Tina.
Stay beautiful you white light.
— Gerry
Gerry Gomez is a former Prepare for Change board member and Media Lead who helped publish the Planned Chaos series during his tenure. He’s an investigative journalist, creative director, and hybrid war correspondent who has spent a decade documenting the convergence of financial, media, and geopolitical forces shaping the current global transition. Find his blog post at: naradigmshift.substack.com
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