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Coherence vs Resonance – Leading by Example
Rev. Kat Carroll
There’s a subtle distinction that keeps showing up lately – in spiritual conversations, social movements, and even in how we communicate with one another:
coherence vs. resonance.
They’re often treated as the same thing, but they’re not.
Coherence is alignment within.
It’s what happens when thought, emotion, body, and intention stop pulling in different directions. When nothing is forced, energy stops leaking. When you try to squeeze a handful of sand, it leaks through your fingers. Perhaps we should stop trying so hard to hang onto some things… and let then sit quietly and settle.
A coherent being doesn’t need to persuade.
They simply are. Coherence is a higher, calmer frequency, or way of being.
Resonance is alignment between.
It’s what happens when another system encounters coherence and recognizes something familiar within itself. We gravitate toward others with a similar way of being. It’s an energy that you sense more than see.
A guitar string vibrates when you pluck it.
And the others around it respond to that vibration.
A coherent person naturally resonates with others. Those who are unsettled or fearful often find themselves lifted by the presence of someone more centered.
I was reminded of a young horse I once tried to teach to walk in water. No amount of pulling, coaxing, or encouragement worked, because it was new, unfamiliar… He was afraid. The more I tried to make him step in, the more he resisted.
So, I stopped trying to make him move, and instead, I led by example.
I stepped into the water first.
I splashed around.
I stood calmly, relaxed, unafraid.
Before I knew it, he was splashing in the water beside me.
Nothing changed about the water. What changed was the field around it, and in myself.
I would never ask him to do something I would not do myself. My coherent state led to resonance that we both enjoyed. It wasn’t about dominance, but a sharing of mind and spirit.
And isn’t that the Golden Rule… doing to others as you would want done for yourself?
You can’t demand resonance from people, animals, or from the world. Attempts to do so usually create resistance, noise, or fear. But coherence? That can be cultivated at any moment. You need only be the example.
This is why many of us meditate; not to escape the world, but to increase coherence and raise our vibration.
This is why a small group of Buddhist monks is quietly walking 2,300 miles for peace. They can affect many on their journey, without saying a word. Their coherence creates a field that some feel immediately. Some don’t, and that’s okay.
Resonance is not based on consensus. It’s about recognition.
On this 10th day of the 1st month of a “1” year, it feels like a fitting reminder: the most powerful signals don’t shout and they don’t recruit. They radiate.
We don’t change the world by pushing others into the water. We change it by stepping in ourselves – with compassion, presence, honesty and trust.
And when the time is right, others will follow…
not because they were told to,
but because something in them already knows the way.
This year, we are reminded that we are all ONE. Let’s lead by example.
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