By Nanice Ellis,

Many wise mystics and philosophers would agree that life is a choice between love and fear, and depending on which we choose, moment to moment, a new world opens to us.

Love Tips the Scale

Now, imagine a vibrational scale with fear on one end and love on the other. Choice by choice, every time we choose love over fear, we help tip the scale in favor of love, and we aid in raising humanity’s collective vibration. Making a difference in the world doesn’t require invention, innovation, time, or even money, and, in fact, choosing love is the one thing that makes the biggest difference.

Once love outweighs fear, the world will reach a vibrational threshold where love dominates, and, from that point on, the momentum of love will easily ripple throughout Earth – resulting in peace, cooperation, and abundance for all. No matter how trite, it’s true; love is the answer and love can save the world.

It’s easy to love someone you care about, but what happens to love when faced with those you dislike?

Love the Unlovable

We are all actors on a stage, so, instead of seeing good guys and bad guys, let’s remember that we are all playing parts, and let’s not mistake the costumes for the actors or the act for reality. Always be true to yourself, but also remember that it’s all a grand illusion and no one is ever permanently hurt in the production.

Within every bad guy is a good guy playing an important role, often motivating others into self-empowerment, and without bad guys, we might stay asleep in complacency and never awaken. So, don’t be too quick to judge. You just never know who’s behind the “dark mask” nor the purpose of their part. Oftentimes, the “dark masked ones” don’t remember themselves, and they need someone to see behind the facade, and cast a little light in the shadows.

My mother once asked me, “How can you love everyone – even those who don’t deserve it?”
I answered, “But mom, those are the ones who need love the most.”

The Price of Love

Just as it can be difficult to choose love when we don’t love someone, it can be equally difficult to choose love when we are angry at those we love. Oftentimes, choosing love requires forgiveness, but if we feel wronged or misunderstood, forgiveness seems to put us at a disadvantage, possibly making us vulnerable to additional mistreatment, whereas holding a grudge creates an energetic shield that protects us from potential harm. Indeed, it can be difficult to choose love when doing so makes us vulnerable.

I won’t fool you; sometimes there’s a cost to choosing love – whether pride, righteousness, or vulnerability, you can’t choose love without paying the price of letting go.

Put Your Weapons Down

Sword, Fist or Anger makes no difference; all forms of defense keep you from the love you seek and the love you have to give.  Don’t be fooled by judgment because it’s the biggest weapon of all! As a product of fear and the antithesis of love, you cannot be in love and judgment at the same time, and this means that every time you choose judgment, you reject love. Whether physical or emotional, put your weapons down and choose love.

Choose Love - Weapons

My son and I use to get into the same argument all the time; from my perspective, he was completely irrational, and I needed him to see the error of his ways. Of course, this only fueled his fire and the fire between us. One day, when the same argument arose, instead of giving into judgment and righteousness, I chose love. Finally, when being right was no longer more important than loving my precious son, judgment dissolved and I didn’t need to change his feelings, thoughts, or beliefs. No words were exchanged, but as my son also chose love, something shifted, and we never experienced that argument again. Consequently, our relationship permanently transformed.

Ask yourself, “Who am I withholding love from?”

There’s a tremendous cost to withholding love because whatever you withhold from another, you also withhold from yourself. You see, when we feel judged, disrespected or wronged in any way, the first thing we do is protect ourselves. However, when we close down and withdraw love from the one who hurt us, we inadvertently withhold love from ourselves. This is because the perception of mistreatment makes us feel unworthy and when we feel unworthy, we instinctually withhold self-love.

Just to be clear, choosing love does not mean that you should allow yourself to be disempowered in any way, nor does forgiveness require that you continue or rekindle a relationship. By first choosing love for yourself, your choices will support all involved.

What Does it Mean to Choose Love?

First ask yourself, “Where am I blocking love in my life?” Maybe instead of shutting down, open your heart, instead of reacting, practice forgiveness, instead of judgment, be compassionate, instead of separating, engage connection, instead of being closed and protective, give love through a genuine smile, handshake, hug, compliment, good deed or some random act of kindness. Make everyone’s day brighter and when you meet people, really see them. Look into their eyes and notice the beautiful beings beneath the masks. When you ask about someone’s day, stop and really listen to the answer! You just never know how a little kindness can change someone’s life!

Whenever possible, always give to those in need, but do so without judgment. Don’t be fooled, feeling sorry for someone is as much judgment as gossip, especially when we use another’s woes to feel better about ourselves. So, in conjunction with giving, choose loving thoughts and choose to see the True Being beyond circumstances.

No doubt, the love you give ripples out from those you love, and when you love someone, your love flows to everyone they love. So ask yourself, “How can I make those I love feel more loved?” Furthermore, since love goes two ways, allow others to love you and feel their love; if you block being loved, you block the flow of love.

Stop Mirroring and Start Loving

When my dog, Neo (yes, he’s named after the Matrix), encounters other dogs, he immediately matches their energy, so if another dog is playful, he’s playful, and if the dog barks, he barks. Most of us do the same thing, and because we mirror each other’s energy, we get sucked into fear and can’t hold the vibration of love long enough to experience shifts in those less loving.

Courageously be a light in the fog, and even if people judge, keep shining because it does more for the world than fifty years of peace talks.

So, instead of seeking love and noticing where love is lacking, give love, and keep giving love. Consider what would happen if you made the unconditional love you feel for a pet or child, the baseline for loving everyone? I can’t predict how long it will take, but I promise, all the love you give will not only make a difference in others, it will return tenfold. You might even notice that you’re actually happiest when you’re loving.

Lip Prints

Many years ago, I was paired up with a random roommate at a conference (except this random roommate was actually divinely selected by the Universe – what appears random is always by divine selection). Anyway, every morning she got up at 6 am to run, and when I got up an hour later, I would find a sweet, good morning note, and because she kissed the note while wearing lipstick, her warm words were accentuated by a pink lip print. By the third day, I was jumping out of bed to read the morning’s note – and without fail, each one was stamped with lip prints.

At the time, I had just finished writing a book about “the simple ways to make a big difference,” but I held off publishing because I couldn’t find a good title. Because my roommate’s lip printed notes made me feel the love and kindness I desired to inspire in the book, I decided to name the book “Lip Prints!”

Sometimes we forget that little things make a big difference, and something that barely takes an effort can make someone’s day and even change their life – not to mention the untraceable ripple effect where one kind gesture inspires another and so forth.

Today, I’d like to make a difference by helping you make a difference. As my gift, Lip Prints is now free to download at – and please don’t hesitate to gift it forward.

Your Love Makes a Difference

Love can save the world, but we must all play our parts. What if we miss that vibrational threshold because we are one hug short?  Since every act of love and kindness contributes to the whole, let’s not overlook a single opportunity to love and be loved. So love everyone and especially those least lovable, because they need love the most!

Be the Change You Want to See in the World – Choose Love Today, and keep choosing over and over again, because it’s the one thing that can make the biggest difference.


About the author:

Nanice Ellis has been a professional Life Coach for over 20 years, successfully coaching women and men from all over the world. She is also an author, Theta Healer and Master Neuro Linguistic Practitioner.



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  1. This part made me think.
    “Oftentimes, choosing love requires forgiveness, but if we feel wronged or misunderstood, forgiveness seems to put us at a disadvantage, possibly making us vulnerable to additional mistreatment, whereas holding a grudge creates an energetic shield that protects us from potential harm. Indeed, it can be difficult to choose love when doing so makes us vulnerable.

    I won’t fool you; sometimes there’s a cost to choosing love – whether pride, righteousness, or vulnerability, you can’t choose love without paying the price of letting go.

    As long as we feel wronged or misunderstood, we can’t forgive. Oftentimes it’s within us that we find the need to forgive ourselves for feeling shame, guilt and failure. As we judge the world outside of us, so do we judge ourselves. That’s where the trigger is that draws experiences of mistreatment and abuse.

    As I perceive it, the more intensity we invest in NOT wanting it, the more we’re investing in drawing it to us. The inner judge rules our inner world and peace can’t enter our home or heart. That’s the magic of fear that is well known to those who feed off it. To not take things personal is a state reached after having felt the opposite and the decision to find the core of that habit, that contradiction of self-importance that doesn’t serve us but keeps us frozen like a rabbit on the road, reflecting the car-lights in its eyes.
    When abuse and mistreatment has happened, we need to first deal with the frost, the feelings. And find the present in it that shows us who we truly are and learn to know ourselves better. Not by pointing at shortcomings and malfunction, but at our sleeping power, as creators and transformers.
    When I feel that forgiveness puts me at a disadvantage, my ego is telling me that I lose face, expose myself to more mistreatment. That’s all storytelling by my ego, also the idea that I create an energetic shield by holding a grudge. That’s all about the old adage of “keeping up appearances” and living up to the outside world’s expectations of a performance that is supposed to be COOL, as opposed to warm.
    Look at the expressionless faces of the hooded figures in the streets, of the fashion models nowadays.

    A price to pay in letting go? Again, that’s only my ego, storytelling. How many thoughts can I think to see my life as beautiful? How many to see my life as awful? It’s a revolving door as long as my ego is the story-teller. Letting go is fully outside my ego’s voice, otherwise it can’t be done, you see? At times, letting go seems to be complete and suddenly there’s a residue or resentment popping up. “Oh, I had no idea it was still with me, that issue” Sometimes letting go happens in layers, through time. Only when surrender to my true self occurs, letting go is a breath of relief, an experience of freedom. The humor in it is that something is won in the process of letting go and that’s tremendously helpful to continue to live with healthy boundaries. Discernment is a big part of it, when they’re in working mode.

  2. Love it not sex. There is nothing wrong with sex except how it is being used to control and manipulate to feed egos. That’s stupid and arrogant. And love without wisdom sets the stage for manipulation and control of that individual. Choose love, but set boundaries in the beginning because demands for what was not set In the beginning does not work. Know what you are working with. A Lightworker is not stupid or gullible. She/he acts consciously and loves her/himself first. Respect is earned, not a given!

    More than one dark forces’ agendas have used sex and love to destroy and control others -religions for example. How many women are slaves to religions and male egos because she never learned to think for herself and how to say NO.

  3. There are humans on earth for whom the only way to see a woman’s naked ass crack is to walk on a nudist beach.

    This is an issue that neither the Event will solve it, with all its endless abundance…

    So, for those who have it not nearby… they will not find it ‘in the foreseeable future’,… but,… never!


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